The Bird Bandit

Well, the Bird Bandit had struck again and my master found another dead bird when she came home. I don't know where it came from, I swear. I was home alone all day and it must have fallen down from the sky. I had my monkey in my mouth all day so it wasn't me.

I fooled her until I started licking my chops. I couldn't help it. It reminded me of KFC except that I got the entire bird, and it was fresh. Mmmmm.....I will pray for more fallen birds.

My New Vuitton

I am sooo happy because I got a new purse today.

It's called Chewy Vuitton and it matches my coat. It also has beautiful sparkly designs in the front with diamonds and the Chewy Vuitton logo.

I am styling and I also look gooood. Paris Hilton's got nothing on me!

My Bowl Haircut

My mom said that my butt hair was getting too long and that I was shedding too much in the house. So, she had this smart idea of taking a pair of scissors and cutting my butt hair by herself. Well, look at what she did!! I got a bowl haircut and I look awful! I am sooo ashamed, I can't even go out in public.

It makes my butt look big too.

Sigh, my life is over now.

My Hats

In honor of the Kentucky Derby, I am wearing my various hats. Don't I look smashing, like Eliza Doolittle in My Fair Lady? "I washed me face an' 'ands before I come, I did."


And here's another one in honor of the great Queen Elizabeth. It looks like one of her old lady hats. God Bless the Queen! Hip hip! Or whatever they say.

As Christian Siriano would say, "Don't I look fierce?!"

MTV Cribs

Hi! Welcome, MTV to my crib. I will show you around and give you a tour of where I live.

This is my doggy door that only I can get in and out of. At first, I was scared of it because it makes a big noise. But, I can go in and out all by myself now. I love this door because it leads to the kitchen, my favorite place in the house.

This is my second favorite place in the house: "THE SPOT". When my master tells me to go to my spot, this is where I go. And usually, food gets thrown at me here, so it's a special, magical place. I have my food and water bowls here, and I also get my daily bananas in the morning here at "THE SPOT".

This is my balcony overlooking the city. I pretend that I'm the king and I look down at my people. In the back towards the left is the Pacific Ocean. Awww, I can smell that salty air from my Crib. Isn't the view just "fierce"?

And, last of all, this is my bed. It's half a crate with my blankie, which is a lamb wool cover. It's soo soft and comfy. This is where I dream about my next meal...

Well, that concludes our tour of my crib. Come back again and maybe I'll show you where I pee! Haha!

Thanks, MTV for joining me at my crib. Peace!

Yogurt Face

Today was a happy day. Once a month or so my master finishes a large container of yogurt. That's a good thing because I get to lick the inside all clean!! And I am very good at that! Here I am patiently waiting. Mmmm....I can see lots of smears of yogurt in there....

I first started licking the outside edges and it was my lucky day because it was the strawberry flavor! I don't really like the "plain" flavor because it's a bit tart.





Then, I stuck my whole face into the container so that I can reach the sides and the bottom. That's a trick I learned.

Can you see the yogurt all over my face? My head is all hard and sticky now. Too bad I can't lick my own head! I can't wait until next month. I hope it's strawberry again...

Dum Dum

Tonight I got to taste this new food called Dum Dums. It's this little tiny ball on top of a stick and it's sweet and comes in all different types of flavors. I tasted the Artificial Cream Soda flavor. I don't know what "Artificial" means, but it was very yummy.

Since I have never eaten this Dum Dum thing before, I didn't know how to actually eat it! I started off licking it little by little, and that was good. But I wanted more, so I put it into my mouth. My master told me that I couldn't swallow it, so I just held it into my mouth like this. I could still taste the Artificial Cream Soda flavor though.
Like a good boy, I spit it out when my master told me to drop it.

I wonder if they make a chicken liver flavor???